Treasures in Heaven

Hello!!

It's been a 4 weeks since I moved to Tyler and started the Forge. It amazes me how quickly the Lord works. He is already teaching me more about his character, more about myself, and more about the community he has graciously given me. I can already see John 15 taking place. The Lord is pruning me!

John 15

I Am the True Vine

15 “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 3 Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. 7 If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples."

To be honest, it’s difficult to put into words all that I've learned in the short time that I’ve been here. The Lord is constantly showing me areas of my life that I need to surrender to him. Choosing just one lesson to share is difficult, but I know that the Lord is sovereign and will have me write what is most glorifying to him, and is hopefully helpful to you.

A few days into the Forge, our director challenged us to determine our needs (what we struggle with or need to grow in) as a community. We all went our separate ways and took some time to pray. I went up to my room and sought the Lord. I asked him to examine my heart and to reveal to me what I truly needed to grow in during the Forge.

Here is an excerpt of what I wrote in my journal:

"My heart longs for so many things, and my longing for them can be tremendously greater than my longing for the Lord."

This was (is) the state of my heart. This is true of the hearts of so many who do not believe that God is who he says he is. When I desire things of this world more than I desire the Creator of the World, it’s likely that my view of the Lord has been distorted. If I am not daily seeking God, reminding myself of his love and character, my thoughts about him will begin to change. The truth I know about him runs the risk of being silenced by the noise of this world.

I confessed my thoughts to my community. I shared that I needed the holy spirit to renew my mind and help me truly believe that God is glorious and worthy of more adoration, longing, and praise than things of this world. I prayed that the Lord would make my heart his and his alone. I prayed that my thoughts would be focused on the kingdom of heaven.

In the interest of honesty and vulnerability, I'd like to share some of the things that tend to take precedence in my thoughts:

- My desire to be accepted by others

- My desire to be accomplished

- My desire to be beautiful in the eyes of the world

- My desire to be fit/ healthy

- My desire to be in control

- My desire to have a successful career

- My desire to be financially stable

- My desire to be productive

- My desire to be loved

In my quiet time later that week, I read Matthew 6. God used his word to affirm the truth that he is better and far more worthy than all the fleeting things my heart desires.

Matthew 6

9 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also 22 “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. 23 But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness. 24 “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other."

Verse 22 states that light comes into the body through the eye, therefore if our eyes are unhealthy (or lusting over things of this world), our whole body will be dominated by darkness. "Jesus tells us that either our eye is directed at heavenly things (and therefore full of light) or it is directed at earthly things (and therefore full of darkness)."

In his loving kindness, God reminded me that the world is deceptive. All of the things in this life that seem more glorious than God, pale in comparison to his perfection and splendor. I can be deceived into thinking that the desires I have apart from the Lord will bring light to my life, but in reality, all they will bear is darkness and destruction. They are short-lived; they will never fulfill me like the Lord can. In them, I will not find the abundance I have in Jesus.

The best thing about realizing my sinful nature, is also realizing that I DO NOT have the power to transform myself. God, in his grace, does not condemn me for my thoughts and desires, but instead sends me a helper. John 16:13 says “When the spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth, for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak, and he will declare to you the things that are to come. He will glorify me, for he will take what is mine and declare it to you.”

The Holy spirit reminds me of truth. When I am weak, he will speak the words of Jesus and will realign my heart, reminding me to sing praises to the one who is truly worthy of them. I trust that as I seek the Lord and spend time in his Word, he will reveal himself to me. He is already using scripture to show me just how marvelous, mighty, loving, holy, and worthy he is. My struggle still exists and my heart still wanders, but I trust that as I seek to know my Father, “the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace.

In his love,

Xenia